INTJs and Texting

Hints of Attraction - Texting

Texting in today's world is very common and it is becoming a valuable tool as a means to begin a relationship. Texting is a non-verbal and in most cases a non-aggressive means by which to communicate to an individual and express one's thoughts and "feelings." It can also be a way to ease anxiety and uncertainty before major events or in awkward situations.

   

For now, I will be examining 5 common ways one could use to let someone know there is possible interest romantically or otherwise. Please note, these 5 tips come from personal experience and observations of my friends and their relationships. Additional input or suggestions are welcome.

Texting is (usually) the first step!

As expressed before, texting is a way to ease tension and communicate in a non-"awkward" manner. This means of communication should be used to begin the first few steps in the communication process. Eventually, you should move on to talking on the phone, Skyping, meeting each other for drinks, coffee, or even dinner. You could almost think of it as a quote "gateway" of the communication steps.

Getting the Number!

To start texting, your first challenge will likely be getting the other individual's number. This step could be really easy for some people, but for others, this can be a really difficult task.

If you are in a work environment, I typically see the other interested party make up an excuse to need your number for "work" when they really just want to get your number for talking to you for personal reasons. Don't get me wrong, they will use it for work that one time. However, any time after that is mostly personal.

In a relaxed (non-working) environment, the manner in which the interested party gets your number may vary. I have seen many creative ways in which people do this. Sometimes people will make corny one-liners about losing their own number and can they have yours. I've seen some people steal their crushes phone when their not looking and enter their number and text them later. So this should give you a general idea of where I am going with this point. Just keep your eyes and ears tuned to something that may look or seem slightly suspicious. In all likelihood, they are trying to get your number. It is up to you to determine whether it is for personal or professional reasons. Confidence and honesty are key! If you really want someone's number, just go up to them and ask them for it. Make sure to strike up a little conversation to ease the mood a little and then as you are wrapping up the conversation, tell him or her that you would like to talk more and ask for their number then.  

Last Night/Early Morning Text Conversations

Once you have your crushes number, this is where there is a difference of opinions. To determine whether or not someone is actually interested in you, here are a few signs to look out for. Not all these signs are proven, however, they could be a strong indication of something.

Firstly, when do they text you? It is really early in the morning or is it late in the evening? Or is it mid-day? Whenever it is, it tells an interesting story. Typically any time you get a text in the early morning, it could be an indicator that you are the first thing they think of when they wake up and you are the first person they want to talk to. This is the more common interpretation and as also, there might be an outlier. If it is a late-night text, it could be one of many things. The first one I will leave up to your imagination. The other reason could be explained through the possibility they just want to let you know that you are the last thing they think about at night. How late he or she stays up texting you should also be considered. If he or she falls asleep texting you, you can definitely take that as a hint.

Amount and Type of Texts

When texting your crush or when your crush is texting you, take note of how long you've been texting and what kind of texts you are sending. If you are sending long and thought out texts and your crush is only sending back one to two worded replies, they are either really busy and don't have time to talk, or they are not interested. If you start up a conversation on two or three different occasions and this same thing happens, then that should serve as an indicator that he or she is not that into you. However, if the opposite is the case and he or she returns your texts and uses full sentences, then that should be considered to be somewhat genuine interest. Remember not to confuse the term with "Just want to talk" and "Let's have a relationship." Those are two different can of worms and should be handled as such.



Also:

Take note when he or she starts a text conversation and notice the amount of "y"s he or she puts on the end of the word "Hey." See the picture below:

Use of Emoticons!

The use of emoticons in text conversation is almost always a good thing. Unless the emoticon is a sad face all the time or is something that is not positive, then it should be seen as a good sign. Using smiley faces, happy faces, etc in text messages gives the other person a general idea of what emotion you are feeling at a particular time. If you are interested in someone and you want to let them know, use emoticons that present a positive image on you and your current mood.

If you have questions about this article, please contact to let me know. My goal is to educate you all on relationships and the like, so feel free to let me know if you'd like any additional information or clarification. This is meant to educate some of the more uneducated INTJs. I also am considering this a test post to see if there is interest in additional relationship concepts or perspectives from an INTJ. This is a very basic and mundane post, any others will be a lot more in-depth and more relatable to the INTJ lifestyle.

- Andrew